BE A CHARACTER IN THE NEXT LOMAX & BIGGS BOOK.

There’s a certain subset of people who delight in the idea of having their good name used as a character in a book. Any book. Even one of mine.

It’s a bribe I can afford, so if you want to be a character in the book I'm writing now, you can enter by going to the Contact Marshall page.

I’ll pick one winner out of all those entries, and add other contests as we go along. But I won’t post them on this page. You’ll have to find them.

My motives are pretty obvious. I want you to come back often, and read the blogs, and tell your friends about the site, and have them discover Lomax and Biggs, and then maybe they’ll go out and buy a book, and then — do I really have to explain the delicate balance of Art and Commerce to you?

The following people entered last year and are now forever immortalized (or humiliated) in Flipping Out a/k/a Dead Wives Club in the UK.

I’m sure once they get their hands on the book I’ll be hearing from them. Or their attorneys.

Speaking of which, I've been asked my counsel, the esteemed law firm of Lawrence, Curley & Moe to post the standard legal disclaimers that nobody ever reads anyhow. Here they are:

This is a free site open to the public. You must be this tall to enter. Shirts and shoes are required (pants are optional). Please lower your expectations as you enter, extinguish all smoking material, and return your seat backs and tray tables to the upright position. All exits are clearly marked. No cell phones, no flash photography, no loitering, no littering, no lollygagging, no skateboarding, no rollerblading, no boom boxes, no standing while the site is in motion, and absolutely no whining. Employees must wash hands before leaving the site and returning to work. Objects in mirror are closer than they appear and there are substantial penalties for premature withdrawal. If you are experiencing transmission problems, please reboot your computer. If transmission problems persist for more than four hours, consult a urologist. We’re here to help. If you don’t see what you want, ask for it. Nicely.

And finally, this website and the contents therein are the intellectual property of Marshall Karp (who has never been accused of being an intellectual, but he wrote it, so he owns it) and said contents are protected by the copyright laws of the United States of America. While you are free to share the wit, wisdom, wiseass remarks, vapid insights, and ponderous non-sequiturs found on this site, full credit must be given to Mr. Karp in accordance with Article I, Section 8, Clause 8, of the United States Constitution which grants authors the exclusive right to their writings, and can be explained in excruciating detail by Vinnie “the Convincer” Teppista, of our Customer Service Department.

Have a nice day.

©2010 Marshall Karp